Giving Thanks....

On this day, the 23rd of November, 2006, Americans eat, laugh, watch football, gather with friends and family, and hopefully take the time to look around for a second and give thanks....but how many have actually done that today? Have you? I want to make sure that I do, and so here goes, my list of things that I'm thankful for, please do add to the list of what YOU are thankful for as well:

God
His Son
Grace
Freedom
My family
Friendship
Communication
The ability to have all five senses fully functional in my being
Reasoning capabilities
LOVE
Communication
The beauty of nature
music
laughter
puppies
The priveledge of seeing the Rocky Mountains every day
feeling the warmth of the SUN as it washes over my face
HUGS
The abundance of Coffeeshops in Denver
Shelter
Provision
The opportunity to be a positive influence in the world
My health
Hearing from an old friend
Making new friends......

Now it's your turn~

My 15 days in the Wilderness

I had the honor and priveledge to go on a 15 day expedition with Outward Bound Wilderness during this month of October for 15 days in Southwest Utah. It was an amazing experience in which I learned not only the hard skills of riverboating and backpacking, but also the soft skills of working with 6 total strangers for two weeks in order to be self sufficient and survive in our canyonland wilderness.

The course was titled the Southwest Mystery Expedition and was so named because the instructors planned the itinerary, but kept us students in the dark as to what all was planned until usually the morning of. Sometimes we would have an idea of what we would be doing due to the equipment that they would have us pack, but where we were going and for how long was always a mystery. This was a challenge to most of us because we so often wanted to ask questions to have a better idea of what to expect and be in control of our situation. But this was not usually the case. We were forced to trust that the instructors knew what they were doing, and we had to rely on each other for help and support.

We started in Potash, Utah which is southwest of Moab. From day 1 to day 9 we took one support boat, which stored all of our food in huge coolers and boxes, guided by an instructor, and then the other six of us were in a paddle boat that you typically see floating down the river when whitewater rafting. The water level was much higher and faster than normal, so some of the rapids that are normally class 3 became class 4; which made for an exciting ride! During this time we learned how to scout rapids in order to find the best route to take so as not to flip the boat or get stuck, we learned how to tie up the boats on the side of the river to tree branches or rocks, how to set up camp (the kitchen, the groover-I'll get into that, and our tarp which was our shelter for the next 15 days).

This might be too much information for some of you, but I know most of you are wondering....while on the river we urinated into the river, but when it came to #2 we used something called a groover. This was a military ammunition can in which we took off the lid and replaced it with a toilet seat and called it good. We would set it up away from the group, hidden behind trees or a rock or something, and then we could just take our time doing our business! This was one of the first things to be set up when we would set up camp for the evening. I must say, I pooped in some of the most beautiful places I've ever seen while on this trip!

On day 9 we made the switch from the river to backpacking. One instructor split from the group for about a day and a half to take the boats out while the rest of us began our journey through the canyonlands on foot. We learned how to repel, shimmy lateraly on rocks hanging on by our fingertips and toes lest we fall into a pool of freezing water-sometimes as deep as our height, construct a harness out of a piece of rope, spot each other on difficult climbs, and basically just work together in order to get the whole group to complete whatever task we were given.

On day 11, after being together every single minute of every day, we went on "solo". This was a time when our instructors picked a spot for each individual to spend a little over a day and a half completely in solitude with nature. We were allowed to bring our sleeping bag and pad, a solo tarp for protection, a journal, any letters we wanted to write, and they gave us a "solo pack" of food which did not consist of much more than crackers and electrolytes. I enjoyed this time so much 1) because my spot was absolutely gorgeous 2) because it was a good break from the group 3) it gave me time to reflect on what I had experienced so far 4) there was no schedule, I could sleep as long as I wanted and just take my time doing whatever I chose.

I think what I took away most from the course was patience. Patience with others, patience with myself, patience with time and life and God and my environment. I would say that I was physically prepared for the course, regularly exercising most days and hiking a lot during the summer season. But I would say I was challenged mentally numerous times. I did not sleep well at night, for one reason or another, so after a long night of turning from side to back to side to stomach and over again, it was sometimes quite challenging to have patience with a 19 year old boy who was crabby because he hadn't smoked a cigarette in a few days. I took many a deep breath to keep from losing it when we would be hiking for no more than five minutes and someone would ask when we could take our next break, or how much further we had to go until we were there. Patience.

There are 5 pillars that Kurt Hahn, founder of Outward Bound, based this organization upon. They are: Enterprising curiosity, undefeatable spirit, tenacity in pursuit, sensible self denial, and above all - compassion. These are tenants that we tried to embody while living in our, as one instructor put it, little "utopian society" for 15 days. In addition, hopefully these tenets can also be carried on into our lives now as we are off course. I think I was able to see compassion in a new light after this course by observing how the instructors dealt with students on course. Sometimes, showing compassion didn't necesarily mean making things easier for the student, but offering support, kindness, and sometimes stern words, in order to aid in one's personal growth.

I observed patience when a student was scared frozen while coming upon a portion of a slick rock area that was exposed to a 400 foot drop. The instructor would show patience and compassion by slowly talking them through what needed to happen in order to get through this and overcome their fears. They would never belittle someone or make them feel like they were silly for being scared at different points during the course, they would be there for support and guidance to aid in personal growth and build self-confidence.

One of the reasons I went on this course was to get a better idea of whether instructing is something that I would like to do in the future. After observing the instructors on my course, and talking with them on numerous occasions throughout the course, I feel that I would love to instruct to some capacity while also maintaining the commitments and friendships that I have in Denver as well. This will be a very tricky task, as courses are usually two to three weeks long, but if I can keep a balance of being home and going out on course, I think that it would be an amazing job! The influence you have on lives as an instructor for the time that you are on course with a group of students is powerful, and I got a glimpse of that over the 15 days that I was on my expedition.

Some of my favorite moments on course were the times when I would be hiking with someone and we would be dialoguing and sharing about our beliefs and worldviews. I had a chance to share about my faith in Jesus Christ on numerous occasions, and how much that faith has influenced my life and decisions that I make. I was thankful for those conversations and the opportunities to get to know six other people on a deeper level in such a short amount of time.

If anyone has more specific questions that you would like to ask, please feel free, I would be happy to share! It was an amazing experience and I was so thankful for the opportunity to be able to do it because some people will never be able to experience something like that even if they want to. At times when I was on course and I thought about how good a shower would feel when I got home, I brought myself back to the present moment when I thought about all of the people that will never see a moonrise over the Colorado River while floating down it, or get an inch away from a harvest panel that was painted by natives 900 years ago, or watch the sun rise while inside a sleeping bag atop a canyon mesa 6000 ft in elevation, stare at a meteor shower with stars as bright as light bulbs, witness a rock fall from the canyon walls, float past a flashflood, feel 15 different textures of mud between my toes (I didn't know that was possible!), hear coyote howls echoe through the canyon walls in the distance....and plenty more.

With Arms Wide Open

It's been about three months since my last post, much to at least one friend's disappointment. However, the following blog will show partially what I have been doing in that span of time. It has been approximately a year and five months since I first moved to Denver and I cannot imagine a better place to be living! In the time that I have spent here, I have managed to climbed three 14,000 foot peaks, scramble to the top of the largest sand dune in the US, play on three different soccer teams, and in just under two weeks, I will go on my first Outward Bound Course in southern Utah! Not to mention, all of my friends decided to get married this summer, so I was quite busy traveling to witness the blessed events.

(Left) Snow Shoeing in Winter Park
(Right) Hiking in the Northwest in
between weddings

During every season of the year, I have had the awesome opportunity to bask in the beauty of God's creation in the outdoors. Colorado offers recreational activities in nature all year round! (If it sounds like I'm trying to sell some of you on coming out here.....well, I am!) I was fortunate enough to have a flexible schedule that allowed me to leave work and get out to enjoy some of the most amazing views of mountains, valleys, lakes, and trees that I have ever experienced!



Growing up in the Southwest, there aren't many seasonal changes that occur, but in Colorado, to witness the aspens change from a deep green to brown with yellows, oranges, and reds in between....FANTASTIC! I feel extremely blessed to have lived here for such a short amount of time, and already to have experienced so much beauty and adventure! Hopefully these pictures reflect even a fraction of the awesomeness that the real deal posseses.

After a long 11.5 mile hike in the Collegiate Mountain Range
up Missouri Mountain, a feeling of accomplishment was in the air.

Beauty is all around us, no matter if we are walking down a bustling sidewalk in New York City, or all alone atop a peak in the Rockies. Hopefully we can all remember to take the time to see the beauty that surrounds us, and thank the one who gives us that opportunity. Sometimes life flies by and we don't notice the little things....what beauty have you seen lately?

A Spearful of Thoughts

Recently I watched the movie, "End of the Spear" with some friends. Granted there were a few low budget techniques in the movie, but overall, I highly recommend viewing the movie for the thoughts it may provoke and the amazing story that it tells of how a group of people live their lives wholeheartedly in a way that reflects what is in their hearts. It shows how five women befriended their enemies after all of their husbands had been brutally murdered. Is that what it means to truly love your enemies?


The movie is about the attempt by five missionary families to reach the most violent of all tribes ever documented. The Waodani reside in the eastern rainforest of Ecuador and lived by the rule that you must spear and live, or be speared and die. The movie shows how the five missionary husbands are killed by the Waodoni but the wives respond not in violence, but in the most unexpected gesture of unconditional love and grace-they return to the Waodani people in order to share the good news that they know in their hearts is true. These women, along with their young children, lived among their enemies, nursed their sick, showed them love, and told them the message of Christ in a way they would understand- in the context of their stories and in their language.

This movie got me thinking a lot about where I stand. What am I willing to give up? Am I willing to die for my faith? Am I loving my enemies just as much as I love my dearest friends? What is my reaction when someone does me wrong? If someone has performed an offence against me, do I turn around and show them kindness? Where does my trust lie? Whom do I trust? Do I live for the same reason I would die?

These and many other questions were turned over and over in my head after viewing this movie and I recommend thinking about these things for yourself and watching the movie to see how these people reacted to such things. Would you do the same?

Intro Video

Check out this sweet video that gives you a glimpse of what an awesome organization I am proud to be a part of! Go to OB Wilderness Video

To whom much is given...

It's been a while since my last post and I have only to say that I just haven't made the time to sit down and write out my post. However, this is something that I have been brewing over for the last couple weeks now. I had only further confirmation of this subject when, in passing conversations the same phrase or subject was mentioned, and I am excited to share it with you. It's funny because the initial thought to post came when I was watching the film Spiderman on TV one night. It is the part when Peter (just after he has been inadvertently inoculated with spider venom) is in the car with his uncle and Peter is acting like a typical "I'm too cool for you" teenager while his uncle is trying to reach out to Peter and let him know that everyone goes through the stuff that Peter is going through: growing up, discovering new feelings and emotions etc. But what stuck out to me was right before Peter gets out of the car. His uncle says something to the effect of: "With great power, comes great responsibility." What a loaded statement.

Now I look at this phrase from a personal level all the way to a macrocosmic level (well maybe not that broad, but maybe a national level.) I'll start personally and then grow from there. For the sake of length, I'll only go back to my freshman year of college, although I have other examples much earlier in my life where this path can follow. I chose to go to the University of Portland in Oregon for a few different reasons. One, it was a smaller school, classes averaging 15 or so students, 3000 students in all. Two, I loved the city (artsy, laid back, colorful, full of life). In addition, I was very interested in the soccer programs of the schools I was looking to attend, because that was and still is a huge part of my life, and Portland was one of the top schools for soccer in the nation. There were a number of schools that had some of these qualities, but none except for Portland had one very key element not mentioned: Clive. Clive Charles was the head coach at UP for both the men's and women's soccer programs for over a decade before he passed away from prostate cancer right before I started my junior year. Clive hooked me right away, he was an Englishman with a knowledge about life and the game I loved that was comparable to no one. He was an amazing coach with a fatherly way about him that instantly commanded respect and trust from all of his players.

The reason I speak of Clive is that he taught me so much about so much. He wasn't just my soccer coach, he was a life coach. The knowledge that I gained from the two years that I knew him, I never want to forget, and never should. I have been given a responsibility to carry on the knowledge that he imparted unto me because I feel that that would be only fair to him and to others. I try to live my life in such a way that integrates Clive's life lessons into my every day experience. I think most of the guys and girls who played under Clive feel the same way as I do; and whether carrying on his legacy is through taking on the responsibility of coaching soccer or translating them into various other vocations, it is something I think we all will strive to do for the rest of our lives. I know I will. It's my responsibility.

I think the reason I feel so strongly about carrying on Clive's legacy, is that there is someone who came to this earth long before Clive who taught us all a lesson on responsibility. In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus said to those who were listening, "Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. So if you have not been trustworthy in handling worldly wealth, who will trust you with true riches?" Christ, even though he did not want to, was entrusted with the hugest responsibility anyone will ever have- being crucified on a cross for crimes he did not commit in order to save a fallen world. He was given a choice, as we all do, to follow his father's instructions, or take advantage of the power that was available to him. To whom much is given, much is expected. I have been entrusted with the responsibility to live my life as unto the Lord in every possible facet because of what Christ did for me. Therefore, not only as an individual, but as Christians in general, we must take on the responsibility of being a light in a dark world because we have knowledge of a great power that holds us and guides us and knows all our actions.

Finally, as Americans, we have great power because of our freedoms we received from those who have come before us, and those who fight for it at present. This power allows our nation to influence any and all regions of this planet if we so choose. But that's just it. It is a choice. We, as a nation, can choose; as an individual, I can choose. Much has been given to us, therefore, much is expected in return. Will we rise to the challenge?

Oops...

For those of you who have wanted to make comments, but were then forced to try to become a blogger yourself instead, I believe I have rectified the problem. Rookie blogger mistake. My fault with the settings and such. I believe it is all good now, feel free to comment to your heart's content! :) Have a good one!

Too Quick to Come to Conclusions

This past week I went to a conference at a local college here in Denver regarding faith and culture. One of the speakers, Barry Taylor had some interesting insights that sparked an internal conversation within myself. I am still pondering most of what was said, but I'd like to share one of the paths I've found myself wandering and in the mean time possibly convince you to start watching the show Lost on Wednesday nights as well. :)

One of the points Taylor wanted to emphasize about culture in this present day in age is that it is obsessed with the unexplained. There has been a societal shift from way back in the day when the age of reason ruled, to this newfound obsession with mystery and the unexplained. Pop Culture is searching through this mystery not necessarily to find the answer, but to just be immersed in the mystery itself and experience all there is to experience. For example, the show 'Lost' takes a plane full of people which (unexplainably) separates while plummeting to the earth because of some mysterious malfunction; who have crashed on a desolate island of the coast of....oh wait...it's a mystery; and unexplainable events happen such as a big black cloud coming out of nowhere snkeaking up behind people and then snatching them into an endless abyss, or a paralyzed man can unexplainably walk once on the island. The list can go on, but you see the point.

Taylor emphasized that sometimes people are too quick to come to conclusions within the framework of culture; assuming rather than experiencing for themselves. Back to my example with 'Lost'. My friend Amy and I watch the show together every Wednesday that there is a new episode with gripping anticipation of the characters' every action hoping that it will uncover more of the mystery that shrouds the island and all that it contains. During commercial breaks we enthusiastically jabber about what we think will be the outcome of the episode, assuming that we know what is right. However, almost inevitably, a twist is thrown in that we had not anticipated which makes both of us completely off base in our assumptions, throwing us for a loop and wanting that much more for next week to come more quickly so that we can know more of this mystery.

Perhaps Christians find themselves assuming too much when it comes to culture just as one might assume they have all the answers to a TV show before watching the whole episode. How can one assume they know if they haven't experienced it to some degree or at least taken the time to try and understand why culture does what it does. If we enter into the experience but through a different lense, then maybe we can relate to culture meeting individuals where they are. Maybe culture is searching more for the Divine than we think. Maybe if we look a bit closer, we can see glimpses of truth even in the lowest levels popular culture rather than assuming it is all trash and should be thrown out.


Other reasons to watch 'Lost': Great character development, wonderful acting, sarcastic and whitty dialogue, endless possibilities, to relate with other 'Lost' junkies, you will know exactly what to do and how to survive if you ever find yourself on a plane that has crashed onto a gorgeous island with no sign of help arriving anytime soon.....Wednesdays on ABC....

Science? Art? Disturbing?

A recent exhibition known as Body Worlds 2 has arrived at the Museum of Nature and Science here in Denver, Colorado. As observed from the title, this is a sequel to another exhibition by the same creator who has designed a technique known as "Plastination" which enables the human body to be infused with a plastic-like substance which preserves all parts of the body in the exact same position for an indefinite amount of time. In this way, a cadaver can be frozen in motion with muscles flexed and relaxed in the exact position one would find him or herself if they were doing that movement in real life. Organs are also displayed in this exhibition, for example, a juxtaposition between a healthy lung and that of a smoker. Fetuses and even a woman who died while carrying a baby are also there for display.

There has been some talk of this exhibit and whether it is deemed science or art or if it should even be on display in this manner. I'm curious to know what you think, check out the link for yourself and let me know.

Nothing you can't handle.....

I was talking with a friend today who has gone through some pretty major stuff in her life and she's not even out of her 20's yet. She's experienced more trauma and hardship than some might in a lifetime. But who is to say that a hardship of hers compared to a hardship to someone else is any more or less significant? I think it is important to take someone's situation into context with their life and what they have undergone in the course of their existence. If all they have ever known is a picture perfect life where Mommy and Daddy have always provided for their every care and need, and then all of a sudden they are kicked out of the house, with no work experience, and no knowledge of how to get started, that can be as traumatic to them as a person who deals with an anxiety disorder and is afraid to step through a threshold of a door to a room that contains 20 or more people that they have never seen before.

What I am trying to say is that I believe every individual has a breaking point, a threshold that is between them and God. God knows how much is too much, and when the timing is right to allow the person to fall just a little harder than they might want in order to allow Himself to help take over the driving for a bit, that's when something breaks down. It is written in the Bible that there isn't a thing that God can't get us through, or provide a way out, thus giving us hope for something better, something more. Mother Theresa was quoted saying, “I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much.”

When I was talking to my friend today, I was thinking to myself, there is no way that I could have endured all of the stuff that she has gone through and still maintain the faith that she has in God today. However, maybe it was each one of those circumstances being orchestrated by God so that through every one of those trials, my friend would have only one option left, to turn to God and surrender. Maybe it takes more for some to surrender their life, more trials, more hard times, before one realizes that there is so much more outside of ourselves that is working in this world. I know for certain, no one will endure tha pain and suffering that one man did for the whole world. And for that, I am eternally in debted to His service.

Family vs. Friends

After my second viewing of the movie "In Her Shoes", I pondered the differences between friends and family. For those that have not seen the movie, the interaction between the older sister's character to the younger is one of almost unconditional love. No matter what the younger one does, the older can only stay mad for so long and eventually whatever happens is somehow smoothed over. This is the beauty of family. Through thick and thin, family is family. There is nothing that one can do to undo the ties that bind. This is where I take my family for granted. I do not think that I always give them the gratitude, respect, or credit that is due them because I know they are my family and they always will be.


On the other side of the coin, are friends. Sometimes you can connect with a friend on a deeper level than some of your family members. Sometimes you feel more open to sharing your heart with a friend rather than family. Here's the thing though, for me, I sometimes hesitate to share all of my thoughts or feelings with a friend because they don't have the same tie to me that my family does. They can always get out of the friendship, there is nothing that keeps them from one day saying to me, "Hey it was fun, but I don't think we can be friends anymore."

When does a friendship reach the point where one feels like family and you know that you can say anything to him or her and they will stick by you like a brother or sister? Is there such a thing? I do believe so, I think that's what brings a husband and wife together, the feeling that you can say anything to this person and they will not leave your side, for better or for worse. But until that friendship evolves, it seems as though one must be careful not to give too much of one's heart away lest the pain of losing a friendship becomes too hard to bear. The struggle is when to hold back and when to share. I guess the thing that I need to always keep in the back of my mind is that my Lord and Savior is in reality the only one who sticks closer than a brother. He is in it with me for the long haul, no matter what and I know I can always tell Him anything and He will never leave me or forsake me.

Addendum

So I forgot to talk about my wonderful poppa when speaking of my family. Therefore, he gets a post of his own. :) My dad has been involved in marital counseling for the last 25 years or so. He was an amazing gymnast in college at Springfield in Mass. Currently he is part of Phoenix Seminary's Men's Mentorship Program and is a Biblical counselor through his own non-profit appropriately named Walk and Talk Ministries. His website can be found at www.walkandtalkministries.com

There now, that's better.

Let's Give it a Whirl

Alright so here we go, a new adventure, the art of blogging. We'll see how this recent mode of communication with the rest of the world fits with me. I'm not exactly sure how I am going to approach the subject of my logs as of yet, but at least I have one started right?

Maybe I'll start with where I am located as of the present moment.



This is where I live for another month and a half. It is a beautiful home located in Northeast Denver. I am living with my sophmore year roommate and teammate all through college at the University of Portland, Kristen Rogers. She will be getting hitched on the joyous occasion of May 27th in which case I get the boot and Eric Taylor steps into his new home.

I am in the midst of changing jobs and starting to work for Outward Bound West here in Colorado. I have a heart for working with youth and being in the outdoors, so the combination of the two? What more could I ask for right?

I played soccer in college, won a national championship in 2002 under the direction of coach Clive Charles, may he rest in peace. He was not only the best coach in the world, but an amazing individual who cared about each one of his players as individuals improving their character while at college, not just improving their soccer skills. I will always remember him, and be grateful for the opportunity that he gave me to play for the best team in the nation. I will be playing on the Denver Diamonds WPSL team this summer in Colorado, http://www.wpsl.info/, they are a semi-professional team that is the closest thing to a pro league that exists currently in the states. I still love the game and have fun playing. Until that feeling goes away, I will continue to play the sport I love.



My family-ah my wonderful family. Currently they all live back in Phoenix, AZ where I originated. My 26 year old brother, David, is married to JJ and they are in the music business. check them out at www.jjheller.com. They just released their third album "Only Love Remains" which was recorded in Nashville, TN in the stuio of Mitch Dane (Jars of Clay, Caedmon's Call, Bebo Norman). My oldest bro, Josh, works as a research assistant for a company that produces medical products and is very good at what he does. My mom works for Arizona Highways Magazine: www.arizonahighways.com where she is an editorial assistant. She is a wonderful mother and very talented writer. She was my teacher, along with my two brothers, until we each reached high school. I wouldn't trade my education for anything looking back; but I think it takes a special person to be able to homeschool your kids while ensuring a balance is present in all facets of growth and education.

Well, I didn't mean for this to get so lengthy, but you have to start somewhere right? Welcome to my blog, questions and comments are welcome :)